Creating a life journal or a Legacy Biography as we have called it, requires some research, quiet thoughtfulness and perhaps a few chuckles and tears mixed in for good measure. When we start to consider our roots, our family, and how we were influenced by them, we begin to reveal how we are who we are. This is a great time to talk with older family members whether they are parents, grandparents or aunts and uncles to pick their brains about stories that are part of your family history. Pictures, scrapbooks, family reunions, old letters, Facebook connections, and boxes forgotten in the basement will all provide sources for exploring the history of you.

MY FATHER

What’s his full name?

What is his date of birth?

Where was he born?

Where did he go to school and how far did he go?

What did he do for a living?

Did he have any hobbies, play any sports?

What do you remember him doing for fun?

Did he have any special skills like painting, singing, athletics, cooking, writing, speaking, carpentry, auto mechanics, wine making, gardening?

When you look in the mirror, how are you reminded of him – your eyes, nose, mouth, hair, habits, sayings, walk, attitude?

What was the most important lesson he taught you?

What did you like most about him?

What was the biggest challenge in your relationship with him?

Where is he now?

What special stories have you heard from other family members about your father when he was a young man?

How did aging affect him?

I wish he had…

I wish I had…

MY MOTHER

What’s your mother’s maiden name?

When was she born?

Where was she born?

Where did she go to school and how far did she go?

What kind of work did she do before she married?

Did she have a career after marriage? What was it?

What were her hobbies and special interests?

What did she do for fun?

Did she have any special skill and talents – singing, acting, writing, gardening, dancing, baking, jigsaw puzzles, coaching, sports?

When you look at yourself and your life, what did you inherit from your mother – physically, emotionally and perhaps materially?

What was the most important thing you learned from your mother?

What do you appreciate most about her?

What was the biggest challenge in your relationship with your mother?

Did any of the challenges change as you each grew older?

Where is she now?

What special stories have you heard from other family members about your mother when she was a young woman?

How did aging affect her?

I wish she had…

I wish I had…

MY PARENTS

If you were adopted, what do you know about your birth parents?

What do you know about your parents’ love story – how did they meet, fall in love and get married?

How old were they when they married?

What is the one thing you would change about your parents if you could?

Do you have any siblings – what are their names and dates of birth?

Use one word or phrase to describe each of them as children.

Where do you fit in the order of birth – oldest, youngest, etc?

What words would you use to describe your home life as a child?

I hope you are enjoying this trip down memory lane. It can be challenging to revisit memories of our childhood as it tugs us emotionally but what a wonderful legacy you are creating for people who want to know who you are. If you know someone who should be doing the same thing, please share this series with them.

What will your legacy be? Creating your personal history helps future generations understand you, themselves and their roots. You can leave a legacy of property and money but neither will tell your grandchildren and their children your story or where and how they came to be.  Using this template of fill-in-the-blanks offers the opportunity to help history come alive and give your descendants a true picture of the life and times of YOU.

Someone made a strong impression on you when you were a young adult – a teacher, parent, family member – someone. Consider writing a note to them reminding them of their advice or thoughts and describe your life today. Did they encourage and support you or were their predictions a negative influence? Tell them how their words influenced who you are today.

What was your first real-life job?

Were you a good employee, were you enthusiastic, interested, involved or was it less than inspiring – how did your attitude affect your success?

Did you learn anything about your strengths and weaknesses? What were they?

Did your family influence your first job decision – what role did they play?

Did you accept their advice or rebel against it?

Was your career decision influenced by money, intellectual curiosity, innate talent, creativity, or a desire to make a difference in the lives of others?

When did you leave your parent’s home and how old were you?

Where did you move to? How far away was it? Do you remember the address, the neighborhood, the surrounding stores, shops, businesses?

What kind of furnishings did you have and where did you get them?

When did you purchase your first vehicle and what was it, how much did you pay, did you use it for work? Describe it.

Did you ever throw a really wild party? What was the wildest party you ever attended and what was the wildest party you were ever thrown out of? Were the police ever involved in these memorable events?

What was the biggest financial gamble you ever took and how did it work out?

What was your biggest emotional risk and how did that work out?

Describe the biggest physical risk you ever took and how it worked out.

How did you normally meet friends and lovers at this stage of your life?

Did you ever regret passing up an opportunity for love?

Did you ever pass up an opportunity for money or a job that you regret or are thankful for?

Describe the most romantic date you ever had.

Did you have a busy and active romantic life?

How many casual relationships did you have before the first serious one came along?

What first attracted you to a “significant other”?

What personal traits, characteristics, values and interests helped to deepen your relationships?

What made you feel that you were ready to move beyond a casual relationship to something more meaningful and committed?

Help someone else to create a meaningful legacy by sharing this series with them.

Your Legacy Biography is beginning to take serious shape and the next phase of your life starts to unfold with optimism, confusion, dreams and fears – let’s explore them. The transition from the carefree days of high school or real life challenges of high school is one that each of us has a unique connection with. It’s time to take a look at those days when dreams were still real, challenges were coming at us and the scary prospect of adulthood was rearing its head. It was time to start facing life while still clutching at the naivete of youth.

When you were in high school, did you dream of the perfect job? What was it?

Did any of your plans for the perfect future have to be changed due to academic, financial, health, family, major events or other situations?

What happened and how did it affect you?

After you finished high school, what did you do?

What were the various options open to you regarding, job, school, love, military, travel, etc?

If you proceeded to higher education, describe and name the school, the courses, your best memories and the effect this had on your life both then and now.

What did you do during your summers?

What academic level did you finally achieve?

What difficulties and challenges did you encounter along the way?

Did you have any special teachers, professors, bosses, friends or family who were a memorable influence on this part of your life?

When you think back on your schooling, was anything missing, was there something else you wish you had learned?

Real life began to intrude in those days – what did you learn in the school of hard knocks?

Real lessons also began to show up – lessons about your relationships, money, work – which lessons were learned easily?

Did you ever make some unwise decisions, oversleep, had a check come back, miss an important meeting or do something else that you would consider kind of dumb today?

It may be a mistake to live in regret but if you could make some changes in this phase of your life, what would they be?

Would you choose a different job, different academic path, different friends, different advice?

During that time did you feel in control of your life or were you simply going from day to day to the next “thing”, the next party, the next class, the next paycheck?

If you had a “do-over” what is the one major thing you would change about the decisions you made in your late teens, early twenties – or would you?

What was the major thing that happened during this transition phase that had the biggest impact on your life today?

If you are finding this program has value for you, inspires, challenges, makes you smile or wonder, then give the opportunity to other people you know by sharing through email or another way so they can do the same.