Category Archives: KEEPING ME AWAKE

one of those sleepless nights when a million things are rolling around in my head

AGE SHOULD BE MORE THAN JUST A NUMBER, DAMMIT !

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Shattering Stereotypes and Embracing Life’s Full Potential

There’s a phrase whispered like a mantra throughout our lives: “Age is just a number.” Age should be more than just a number dammit, and the choice is ours. But how often do we genuinely internalize its meaning? We watch time march on, counting birthdays like milestones on a dusty road. We insist on associating them with limitations and decline. But is it true?

What if age, that seemingly linear progression, is instead a mosaic? A vibrant collage of experiences, wisdom, and potential, far richer and more dynamic than a single number can represent.

In truth, the statistics paint an interesting picture. Stop picturing the forgetful grandparent struggling with technology. Consider Johannes Mallow, the 48-year-old world memory champion, or the countless older adults mastering new languages with impressive fluency. Studies show our brains keep their remarkable plasticity, the ability to adapt and form new connections, throughout our lifespan.

Our physical ability can also defy expectations. Marathon legends like Fauja Singh, who tackled the London Marathon at 100, are testaments to the human spirit’s enduring strength. And Ernestine Shepherd, who became the world’s oldest competitive bodybuilder at 86, proves that physical peak performance can blossom even in life’s later chapters.

The world of innovation and achievement follows suit. While we often glorify youthful entrepreneurship, the average age of successful startup founders sits closer to 40 than 25. Experience, it seems, trumps youthful energy when building high-impact companies. And let’s not forget the late bloomers, individuals who find their creative voice or professional calling later in life. Helen Frankenthaler, who redefined abstract expressionism at 50, is a powerful example.

People assume that happiness, that elusive butterfly, seems to take flight with age. A study in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences revealed that people over 85 reported higher levels of life satisfaction than their younger counterparts did. Perhaps wisdom’s gentle hand helps us understand what truly matters and appreciate the richness of each passing moment.

But these statistics are merely stepping stones to embracing the “Age is Just a Number” philosophy. It’s about dismantling the ageist narratives that infiltrate our society, from hiring practices based on arbitrary dates to the limiting expectations we place on ourselves and others.

How about recognizing that a 25-year-old can be a seasoned artist, a 60-year-old can still be an agile athlete, and an 80-year-old a tech-savvy entrepreneur? Potential knows no age, and limitations are often self-imposed.

So, how do we genuinely internalize this transformative message? It starts with a shift in perspective. View age as a spectrum, not a rigid ladder. Celebrate the wisdom gained with each passing year while nurturing the curiosity and spirit of adventure within us all. Let’s champion lifelong learning, embrace new challenges, and redefine what it means to “age gracefully.”

Most importantly, let’s replace the tired figure of decline with the vibrant narrative of continuous growth, boundless potential, and a life that explodes in color and possibility, regardless of the number on the calendar.

Because, my friends, age is just a number. It’s time we started living like it.

Beyond the Number: Practical Steps to Embrace an Age-Positive Life

“Age is just a number.” How do we translate that sentiment into everyday life? How do we dismantle ageist stereotypes and cultivate a genuinely inclusive mindset for ourselves and those around us?

The good news is, it’s not magic; it’s action. Here are some practical steps you can take to embrace an age-positive life:

Challenge your own biases:

  • Awareness is key. Reflect on your own subconscious biases about aging. Do you associate youth with energy and potential while linking older age with decline and limitations? Recognize these thoughts as internalized stereotypes and actively work to challenge them.
  • Flip the script. Instead of focusing on perceived limitations, consider the strengths and wisdom that come with experience. Consider older adults as mentors, resource pools, and valuable societal contributors.

Embrace lifelong learning:

  • Curiosity is ageless. Never stop learning, growing, and exploring new interests. Whether taking a class, picking up a new hobby, or simply engaging in stimulating conversations, keep your mind active and receptive to new ideas.
  • Become a mentor. Share your knowledge and experience with younger generations. Volunteering as a tutor, coach, or community leader can be mutually rewarding, fostering connections and breaking down age barriers.

Combat ageism in everyday life:

  • Use inclusive language. Avoid ageist terms like “senior citizen” or “over the hill.” Instead, use respectful and person-centred language focusing on individual identities and contributions.
  • Challenge ageist assumptions. Stop making assumptions about what someone can or cannot do based on their age. It would help to treat everyone with respect and dignity, regardless of their years on the planet.
  • Advocate for positive change. Speak up against age discrimination in the workplace, healthcare system, and other areas of society. Support age-inclusive policies and initiatives that promote fair treatment and opportunities for all.
  • Don’t be afraid to push back against people who write off limitations based on age – even health care professionals.

Build bridges across generations:

  • Seek intergenerational connections. Spend time with people of different ages, from young children to older adults. Share stories, learn from each other, and celebrate each generation’s unique perspectives.
  • Organise intergenerational activities. Take part in events or programs that unite different age groups, such as community service projects, cultural celebrations, or intergenerational learning initiatives.
  • Embrace family connections. Cherish relationships with grandparents, parents, children, and other family members across the age spectrum. These bonds offer invaluable support, love, and a sense of belonging, regardless of age differences.

Resources for your age-positive journey:

  • Books: “Disrupt Aging” by Jo Ann Jenkins, “The Longevity Book” by Cameron Diaz
  • Websites: The National Center to Reframe Aging, The Global Coalition on Aging, The MacArthur Foundation’s Initiative on Successful Aging
  • Organizations: AARP, Eldercare Locator, The National Council on Aging

Remember, embracing an age-positive mindset is a continuous journey. There will be stumbles and challenges along the way, but every step you take towards breaking down age barriers and fostering inclusion makes a difference. Let’s celebrate the richness and diversity of human experience, regardless of the number on the calendar. Together, we can create a world where age is truly just a number, and everyone can thrive at any stage of life.

Most readers of this corner will know that I recently completed a series of books to help retirees increase their income. It is sad that over 2/3 of polled seniors say that they need extra income in order to live comfortably. So, my point is that not everyone needs more income but instead, are looking for something to add a little life to their lives.

They might just find that in the book series since there are dozens of possibilities presented for learning and connecting with other people. Of course, a few extra bucks might allow them to splurge on that really expensive bottle of wine. And, in case you are wondering, Cabernet Sauvignon and your tokens of appreciation are always welcome.

HOW TO LEARN THEIR SECRETS

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A couple of days ago I noticed a post on Instagram titled “Ask Your Father” and it sparked my curiosity. The author proposed that readers should consider asking their parents about their lives. This is how to learn their secrets and this is interesting for several reasons:

1. as parents, we assume that our kids know all about us – wrong! They only know about the time they spent with us and almost nothing about our life before that. So, I thought I would add a list of things that you (meaning, you crazy kids) might want to ask your parents in order to find some of the stories they are dying to share (and some they aren’t).

2. most of us assume that we know everything there is to know about the people in our lives, especially family.

3. when was the last time you sat down with someone, especially your parents, and focused your discussion on who they are, where they come from, what their experiences, hopes and dreams are?

4. how will you remember that person when you can no longer talk to them?

5. what do you know about your parent’s successes, failures, challenges, opportunities

I would strongly caution us to let our kids initiate this conversation if you want to avoid the eye rolls from people who are too busy or just not interested at this time.

How to learn their secrets

THINGS TO ASK YOUR MOM OR DAD

If you want to learn more about your parents’ history, ask open-ended questions that encourage them to share their memories and experiences. Here are some questions you might consider asking:

  1. Early Life:
    • Can you tell me about your childhood home?
    • What were your parents like when you were growing up?
    • What are some of your earliest memories?
  2. Education and Career:
    • What was school like for you?
    • Did you have any favorite subjects or teachers?
    • How did you choose your career path?
  3. Relationships and Family:
    • How did you meet Mom/Dad?
    • What were your wedding day and early married life like?
    • What was it like becoming a parent for the first time?
  4. Milestones and Challenges:
    • Can you share any significant events that happened during your lifetime?
    • What were some of the toughest challenges you faced, and how did you overcome them?
    • What are you most proud of achieving?
  5. Values and Beliefs:
    • Are there any family traditions or values that have been passed down through generations?
    • How has your worldview or beliefs changed over time?
    • What advice would you give your younger self?
  6. Life Lessons:
    • What are some important lessons you’ve learned throughout your life?
    • Are there any experiences that have profoundly impacted you?
    • What do you hope to pass on to future generations?
  7. Personal Reflections:
    • Looking back, is there anything you would have done differently?
    • What do you consider to be the happiest moments of your life?
    • How do you want to be remembered?
  8. Historical Context:
    • How did world events during your lifetime shape your experiences?
    • Can you share any memories or insights into significant historical events you witnessed?

Encourage your parents to share stories, anecdotes, and personal insights that provide a deeper understanding of their lives. Active listening and follow-up questions can also help to enrich the conversation and uncover valuable details. There is some excellent research on the importance of knowing our family history here.

Many moons ago, I did a series of blogs for people who want to create their own biography. It was a series of questions that you can answer about yourself and then hope that sometime in the future your kids might want to read it. It was very detailed and might still be of interest to you. You can always print out the sections and start at any time. Here’s the link.

WRITING YOUR OWN BOOK IS THE EASY PART

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I hope that title took a few of you by surprise. Yes, writing your own book is the easy part, selling it? That’s when it starts to get interesting. According to Just Publishing Advice, there are about 1.5 million new books published each year on Kindle alone.

So, one might wonder, just how the hell do you get noticed? Someone could write the best book ever written and no one would ever know. I wish that I could say that I have somehow discovered the secret to selling thousands of books, but I haven’t. There seems to be a plethora of experts out there promising to help me do that if I just send them a few hundred dollars, etc.

OK, so I’ve written a few – like the one above among many others. Actually, if you are interested in what else I’ve written, there is a page on this site called BOOKS BY BOB, give it a shot. It doesn’t cost anything to look.

Anyway, I’ve written, published and rewritten 7 books in the past few months and now must move on to something called “marketing.” I spent most of my working life in some sort of sales or client relations position, so you would think I’d know how to sell something by now. Unfortunately, I am going back to school to get me some edumication (sic), and will attempt to make my books more visible on Amazon. A 5-day course starts tomorrow, thanks to the folks at Publisher Rocket.

As some readers of this corner might know, I have completed a 6-book series dedicated to seniors and retirees that offers some ideas about creating additional retirement income. To be more accurate, it offers hundreds of possibilities with all the information needed to put them into practice. I’m pretty excited about that and will most likely continue writing more for this “close-to-home” niche. At least, I will continue writing until golf season starts.

And, just to warn you in advance, I have been thinking and outlining something in the fiction area. No details to share with you yet, but…